Up and Down

At the moment everything goes up and down. The operation was postponed yesterday - so we have to wait another 2 weeks. Up or down? Well, something in between. There is this common saying that you have to travel trough dark valleys to climb the summit. It is very kitchy but true. Without amptitudes in one direction there wouldn't be the other direction. Or easier - no down's, no up's.

I'll be on the wedding of my best friend this weekend -definitely an Up. So please stay tuned until Monday.

GLAUBE

I’m not a religious person. Absolutely not. I neither believe in God nor do I attend any service although I’m baptised and still a (paying) member of the Catholic Church. My view on the world is a more or less rational one. The human body exist of molecules and atoms and a lot of water. When we die it just happens that our metabolism will stop and we’re going to rot somewhere in a beautiful graveyard. Our values and moral system were built on socialisation and education. That’s what drives our behaviour. The only thing I believe in is me. I’m the one who is responsible for my life, my luck and happiness. There’s no God who guides me. And I would never accept such an external interference in my live anyway.

So far, so good.

But, there is one point, one little weakness in my rational view on the world. It’s hope. When I’m not longer able to determine what will happen. Not longer able to control those things. When it concerns my beloved ones. When the reality hurts so much that the only thing I can do is to hope and believe that everything will be good – even if rationality tells me not to do so.

And that’s what we all are going to do for the next days: Believe and trust in the surgeon abilities. And to make waiting easier pray to someone or something: ‘Please let him wake up tomorrow evening’

Sorry, there will be no postings untill monday.

balanced

Sometimes it's hard to believe what we see. Like those sculptures we saw in Sausalito. The artist just put one bolder on another and -tata- it worked just by balancing them perfectly. No glue, no magic, just physisics and patience. I guess, none of us could do it. Life somehow is similar. It follows some kind of structure that is often unknown. And like those sculptures balance is hard to find. Those stone cairn remeber me on one thing: if everything breaks down - and that can happens easily - you just need patience to rebuild it though it will be different.

making faces

Yesterday evening it has started. Perhaps you know it also. Probably you do so. If you have worked a little bit to much, slept a little bit too little, danced on to many parties at one time than you probably know the moment when it starts: this goofy madness. In my case it started under the shower. There, I found out that you can make gorgeous faces in the shower head. And that’s what I did – I made faces to myself. It was funny and silly and even got better as I tried to picture this. Time for a long weekend, don’t you think?

LOCKERS

Sometimes I have the impression that I have to lock everything I am, I’m feeling and thinking deep down into myself. Sometimes to protect myself. But unfortunately it’s not so easy to put everything in a nice box, wrap it, lock it and put it in a corner somewhere in your mind.

Update

1. No picture today because I'm in a hurry (see 2.)

2. No more postings before Thursday as I'm on my way to another business trip to Amsterdam. That's great since it is the first time that I will see that beautiful city. But boring as I travel to a privat lable trade show....

3. Still no telefon or internet at home. Telecom is on strike. That's annoying.

Can’t buy me love?

There have been a few postings about love recently from my blogging friends. And yesterday I found my love posting. Not that we had another cross-blogger serie like the freezer week (what was pretty cool by the way). It just poped into my mind when I saw this bag. We strolled around a pretty ccol area in Düsseldorf called Unter-Bilk. I like the special flair of “working class meets creative people” thou I wouldn’t like to life there. There was one lovely café in an old soap shop what was cosy and very alternative (what I loved!) and heaps of small local fashion shops. One was called “Romantiklabor”. They have a lot af girlish stuff, not really mine. But they’re selling a bag full of love. And it is so easy: You just have to ask very kindly!!!!

PRINZIPIEN

I do have a few things I do not really like to do but I don’t really care about. And I have principles. Things I would never do. Not for rational reasons, just in principle. As drinking things I’m forced to drink. In principle everything somebody wants me to do where I do not see any rational reason for. I have to agree, I’m a little bit stubborn from time to time.

So, what happens? On my business trip to Poland last week I was forced to drink a Mad Dog – some kind of vodka with Tabasco. A very unpleasant experience everybody in our company has to face. Just because it hurts (or better burns like hell) and because everybody did it. Well, not me. I refused to do it. My boss was a little bit offended but he could accept it as I’m a girl. He really told me, than if I would be male he had to insist on it! Okay! Okay?

And I sunk in my very own discussion about how far would I go for my career? Would I abandon my principles? And If I do so, which would remain untouched and which would I give up? And what would happen if I really would start to weaken my principles?

Rund um die Kö

Last weekend we rushed into an cycling race by accident. It was held around the famous shopping mile in Düsseldorf called KÖ (Königsallee). It was fun for us to watch it and fortunately we had our cameras with us. It was the first time for me that I try to picture fast moving objects. I guess, I took a few hundreds photos. And a lot of them showed nothing else than concrete as the cyclists were too fast. Than I start to move myself as the guys past my camera. It was fun - I really felt like a semi professional photographer. I love those pictures that capture the movement, the speed and the competitive spirit.

A Taxi Ride To Poland

Wow, I'm back. Finally! And how was it? Chaotic! First, we missed our flight. Or better, it was postponed. So we had to re book. Instead of flying direct from Dortmund to Worclaw we could only fly to Berlin. Well, better than nothing we thought. Our faces fainted the moment we saw the aircraft. It was not really an aircraft, more a can with propellers. Hm, we survived it and arrived in Berlin safely. And then the real journey started. We had to convince a Taxi driver to bring us from Berlin to Worclaw (Breslau) - that's a 300km taxi ride. As my boss is a former retail buyer and a sales person by heart we did it - for 250 Euro. It took us 9h instead of 4h but it is a good story.

benchmark

Everybody knows that common saying, that the glass is either half full or half empty. How you will see the glass depends on your very own point of view.

Right know I'm facing a few problems with my point of view, especially regarding benchmarking. Am I good? A good athlete, a good colleague, a good person? Compared to all those lazy coach potatoes or boring office jerks I am definitely better than them. But, is better then somebody automatically good? No, not really I guess. Compared to all those super social guys and those "I work 50h a week and train for an ironman successfully" super athletes I regard myself a pretty average. Should I be frustrated now? No, not really. Probably I just have to face it like it is, do as good as I can, always try to do it a little bit better and accept that life can't be perfect.

Perhaps you remember this picture. I took it more than 6 month ago for another posting. Incredible how time passes by. However: I will be on my first business trip for the next days. So, no postings until Monday.

Hairy Beast

From time to time it's difficult to say who is the hairy beast, and who not. Before I took this picture I could state very clear that generally spoken all instects are hairy beasts. If you take a close look on the structure, shell, antennea and mouth - that's ominous! I also sat this beetle on my arm and I really didn't like that feeling. And I planned to write something about how beautiful Germany can be - especially during spring. But after downloading the picture I was very surprised. I shoot it while the June bug was sitting on Joerns arm. And now I have to ask you: Could you tell me who is the hairy beast - instect or man?

Did you know that May beetles are also known as June bugs? Funny isn't it.

location check

As some of you might know, I'm training for an half ironman this summer. This weekend we had a little bit time and decided to spend a day near the event location. As the Allgäu Triathlon is know as one of the hardest and toughest event I thought it might be cool to see what 'hilly course' means. And frankly: I'm horrified! I can't do that. No way! That's hard but I learned to evaluate my abilities very critically and I'm not able to do this course. So, I canceled those plans. And, am I disappointed now? Kind of. But not really. I found another event, just 2 weeks later, flat course, nice location and I will do that. And guess where: ERLANGEN! So guys: We will be around Nürnberg the first weekend in August!

Fortune cookie

As the weekend getting closer and closer, it's time to send you best wishes and chinese knowlege for the days off from work: 'Remember to share good fortune as well as bad with your friends'. I took this picture in the Japanese Tea Garden in San Francisco. It is a lovely spot with traditional japanese architecture, lot of japanese guys doing some kind of Tai Chi, a huge Budha statue and a charming garden cafe. Here we enjoy a cup of tee and (that was the only touristical thing) got this fortune cookie.

nice ride!

There is one thing you need to have in Düsseldorf: an appropriate ride. Not one of those super sleek, carbon fiber road racers or those cheap & crapy bikes form the grocery store. Something that is comfortable and stylish at one time. Something that's more a lifestyle than a vehicle. Something where speed doesn't matter. Something like an holland bike. The first lesson I learned was, that there's a huge variety of holland bikes (old and news, cheap and expensive....). But just one original: the Gazelle! Old fashioned elegance, slow motion cruise mode. Well, what should I say. We bought one and it's really cool!

CLIMB HIGH

A few weeks ago we went on our first semi professional photo shooting. A friend of us had needed new pictures for their rock climbing school. And so we spent few hours near Bad Urach trying to capture rock climbing lessons. It was great fun. The best thing was me in the rocks! To gain a better view and a more interesting perspective they gave me those 'climber pampers' (you know what I mean) and I could crawl around the cliffs pretty save. What a party! I will put up more pictures during the next days on our flickr.com page.

Perhaps you mention the shift from German to English. Well, I don't want to get that rusty in English so I decided to change to English occasionally. Hope that will be fine with you. The other thing is that at the moment I'm just able to post during working days since I still have no internet access at home. German Telecom still need a few days.